How To Save Your Marriage After Cheating
December 30, 2008 by abuhakim
Filed under Cheating Spouse
The pain and bitterness resulting from an extramarital affair leaves both parties emotionally damaged. Both the person who cheated and the victim of thier infidelity are hurt. It is difficult to acknowledge that your partner has broken their marriage vows and after the period of denial, when the truth finally sets in, pain and anger generally follow. You are saddened, angered, reviled by the sense of ultimate betrayal.
Only you can determine if you want to save your marriage. And, this decision can not be made lightly. The road back to sanity in the marriage will be long and hard. While you may forgive the cheating spouse, you have been violated and your ability to trust implicitly has been compromised.
Often the cheating spouse will place the blame on his or her partner. Cheating spouses often attempt to justify their cheating attempting to tear down the esteem of the injured party. Regardless of their flaws or even their culbability in the situation, the person who cheated made the choice to do so.
Only you can decide if you truly want to forgive your partner. It will be an extremely hard decision to make. But with proper counseling and a decision and commitment to honesty the relationship can be healed and trust restored.
If you feel your marriage can be saved, then it is important to sit down with your partner and careful discuss why this happened and what can be done to repair the marriage and to restore the relationship.
I advocate marriage counseling for both parties. As stated in previous post, the problem is not the cheating. The problem is the relationship. A counselor can help both parties understand the underlying triggers that led to the infidelity.
Don’t make any quick decisions. Both partners need to really talk and decide whether their they want to rebuild their relationship and work on themselves both as individuals and as a couple; and why. Make sure that this is understood from the beginning so that high expectations will be tempered with judgment.
Now, if you’re beyond this point (maybe you’re married to a habitual cheater and you’ve had enough) then getting irrefutable proof to end the relationship once and for all may be your best option. Discover how you can find out the truth, quickly, easily and affordably with down to earth simple advice you’ll find in CatchACheatingSpouse.
Why Spouses Cheat|Ten Reasons Spouses Cheat!
December 28, 2008 by abuhakim
Filed under Cheating Spouse, Lying Spouse
Why Do People Cheat On Their Spouses?
Recent studies reveal that 45-55% of married women and 50-60% of married men cheat on their spouse at some time or another during their relationship.
What these findings suggest is that approximately one half of all married men and women seek intimacy outside of their committed relationships. But what does this really mean and why are the number of men and women having extramarital affairs so high?
The question is always why. Why do people do what they do, what makes them cheat on their partners. While the reasons may differ from individual to individual, people cheat because …are you ready? BECAUSE THEY WANT TO!
Before we go there, here are some of the common reasons given for why men and women are unfaithful.
Top 10 Reasons Men Cheat
- He doesn’t love her anymore
- She doesn’t turn you on anymore
- Women let us
- Your girlfriend is a nag
- Opportunity
- Boosts your ego
- You can get away with it
- It’s challenging and exciting
- She cheated on you
- She doesn’t put out anymore
Top 10 Reasons Women Cheat
- Revenge for your cheating
- Exit strategy
- Bedroom boredom
- You’re emotionally unavailable
- Feeling neglected/ignored/underappreciated
- Lack of intimacy
- Revenge or payback for past wrongs (not because you cheated)
- Self-esteem
- Being a Bad Girl
- Not enough sex
This may come as a complete surprise, but most extramarital affair statistics show that cheating is not about sex. What then, is the main factor that causes infidelity? One should pay attention to the signs of spousal cheating. More often than not, it involves intimacy issues when one spouse feels as though their emotional needs are not being met. Yes, it is true in most cases of infidelity about wanting to feel emotionally connected to someone.
If you’re spending more time away from home, working, hanging out with your friends or immersing yourself in a new hobby, your partner may begin to feel lonely. Your spouse of significant other may feel unloved or emotionally disconnected. And if you aren’t giving them the attention they desire, they may go looking elsewhere for it. This is one of the most common reasons for infidelity.
In the end, “people cheat because they want to.”
Unfortunately, most people only see the symptoms and thus address them. Long after the damage is done, and intimacy is broken, the relationship begin to manifest the tell tale signs.
Perhaps you believe your noticing the cheating spouse signs or you have some gut feeling that your husband or wife is stepping out on you.
Habitual Cheating. Now this is something you must enquire about before you get into a relationship. You see often what happens is that some people have a tendency to cheat. It is probably a good idea to check on your lover’s history before you enter into any long term relationship.
If you’ve got that gut wrenching feeling and sour taste in your mouth, maybe we reinforced some preconceived feelings.
There’s only one way to be sure.
Find Out How To Catch The Cheating Spouse Right Now.
10 Signs of an Unfaithful “Cheating” Wife
December 18, 2008 by yommys01
Filed under Catching The Cheater, Cheating Spouse
Consider the Following Signs of A Cheating Wife…
You have been dating the same woman for over a year and you are considering buying her a diamond ring and proposing marriage. You start to look at rings and you actually put a payment down on one. Then, a week later you plan to surprise your girlfriend and take her out for her favorite meal at your favorite restaurant. When you arrive to pick her up, you find her with another man, in bed. Later, you find out it has been going on for months.
Possible Signs of a Cheating Wife
- Highly suspicious – Believe it or not, the guilt that having an affair brings can make a cheating wife obsessive and controlling. She may even accuse you of having an affair in the hopes that her guilt will be met by yours. If she suddenly starts asking a lot of questions about where you’ve been and if there are any other women, look out.
- Watch out if she seems to be unusually happy. Lately she has been very excited and happy except when you are around. Say, for example, you are meeting her and some friends at a club. As you are walking in, you see her sitting and laughing with her friends. As soon as she spots you, her mood may quickly change. She may become indifferent to being there and having fun, as if she wishes she were anywhere else but with you. She may also begin to be grumpy or even try to pick a fight. All these emotions could be signs that she is hiding a dark secret from you, and she’s trying to compensate for an extramarital affair the best way she can.
- Your wife calls out another man’s name in bed. Whether it is when she is making love to you or just talking in her sleep. If she’s thinking about another man enough to say his name in the marital bed, this is a sure sign your spouse is cheating.
- One of the really subtle signs your wife is cheating that you may not even notice is the passenger seat in her car. Many women pick up their lovers and drive them to some remote location for their interlude. If your kids are typically the ones sitting in that passenger seat and every once in a while the seat is pulled farther back, you should be ask yourself, why that is.
- Changes in sexual behavior can also be signs of a cheating wife. Decreased desire for sex could be due to any number of factors, including stress or fatigue, but if your wife suddenly starts avoiding having sex, it is a cause for concern. Some women who are cheating will actually seek out sex with their spouses more often. This might be out of guilt or as a deliberate ploy to keep the husband from suspecting her extracurricular activities. Increased sex drive can also result from other things like hormonal changes, so it is best not to take that in itself as a sign of infidelity.
- A drastic change of activities in the day is also another sign of a cheating wife. If she goes out to “shop” more often, or has “lunch” with her girlfriends much more frequently, this could be reason to examine your situation more closely. Also if she seems reluctant to divulge the details of the venue (the exact restaurant or the names of the friends who are joining her for lunch), there is a chance that she is having an affair.
- The mileage on the car racks up, and suddenly her vacation days at work seem to have dwindled. She might be getting dressed for work and leaving the house, only to drive to the next town over to visit with her lover. She has been taking days off work to be with him! Check into her sick days and vacation time, and if you see there is time off unaccounted for; make a note of it.
- With communication so easy with cellular phones, texting, phone media and so on people can connect with each other whenever they feel like it. The capricious highs of infidelity tend to lead to secretive communications becoming more frequent. If you find your wife often talking on the phone out of earshot or if you answer the phone only to have the caller hang up on you, there may be reason for concern. Also if you find she suddenly clears all her messages, text & voice, when she used to leave them there before, ask yourself why the sudden attentiveness to her cell phone mailbox. Just make sure she’s not planning a surprise birthday party!
- Watch out for expensive gifts. Most of the women like shopping but they are generally reluctant to purchase exorbitant items for themselves, especially if they know their husbands are money conscious. If there is a new man in her life, she could be buying him gifts.
- People often think that if someone is having an affair, then they will neglect their partner. This is often the case, but surprisingly the reverse is sometimes true. This is because of guilt. Women suffer more from guilt than men. So a cheating wife might appear extra nice when she’s with you, buying you gifts, cooking special meals and so on. The real giveaway in my experience is that despite this attention, your wife or girlfriend will probably find reasons for your sex life to become far less satisfactory.
These are all signs of a cheating wife. It does not mean that your wife is cheating but if you recognize significant changes in her behavior, such as those mentioned above, you will want to find out what is going on.
If you suspect your spouse of cheating, stop hiding your head in the sand hoping the problem will go away. Learn the truth now! Visit How To Catch A Cheating Spouse and discover proven and effective techniques to discretely catch your spouse in the act. Don’t be left in the dark wondering, waiting, and hoping the problem will resolve itself. Go to How To Catch a Cheating Spouse and learn the truth – you’ll be glad you did!




